About this test
When we think of a narcissist we picture someone arrogant who only talks about themselves. But psychology distinguishes several types, and some hide behind shyness, victimhood or even apparent generosity.
Imagine how your partner would react in each situation and pick the closest option. There are no right or wrong answers: just be honest.
The three types of narcissism
Grandiose narcissism is the best known: overflowing confidence, need for admiration, a tendency to dominate and little empathy. Vulnerable or covert narcissism, by contrast, comes from insecurity: hypersensitivity to criticism, resentment, a feeling that the world is unfair and a constant need for reassurance.
Communal narcissism, described by psychologist Jochen Gebauer in 2012, is the hardest to detect: the person needs to feel like the kindest, most generous or most devoted, and seeks recognition through what they do for others. The help is real, but it's also a stage.
Why the type matters
Each type creates different dynamics in a couple: the grandiose type tends to impose, the covert type to guilt-trip and the communal type to make you feel indebted. Identifying the pattern helps you name what you feel and set concrete boundaries.
This test doesn't diagnose anyone: narcissistic personality disorder can only be assessed by a professional. Use it as a starting point for reflection.